Anxiety during Menopause and beyond
A lot of women experience anxiety and depression along with other menopause symptoms.
It’s not surprising really, one minute we are living our lives being able to do everything we want to do physically, in control of our lives and maybe in the best shape of our lives, with plenty of energy and then bang! Hot flushes, sleepless nights, mood swings start occurring along with weight gain that is stubbornly resistant to our efforts, thinning hair, memory loss, vaginal dryness and loss of libido, and our gut may start playing up.
Our symptoms fluctuate with our hormones, which come and go with no warning and often show up with the worst possible timing. One minute we have the hormones of a teenager and the next day our hormones are depleted like those of a postmenopausal woman. It’s like we are no longer in control of our bodies, our minds, our lives.
And this has knock-on effects. As I mentioned before, our sleepless nights often cause our sleeping partner a sleepless night and the tiredness may cause tension in the household. Our erratic moods cause us to feel anger or irritation and we find ourselves less tolerant of others, we find ourselves shouting at our partners and children. Quite frankly we’re exhausted, lacking energy and showing signs of ageing, from bags under our eyes to a few wrinkles, and sometimes we just can’t think straight. This can lead to a loss of confidence and self-esteem.
Am I losing it?
The first thing to recognise is that you are not losing your mind, it is your hormones at play.
The decline in oestrogen and progesterone levels can affect the brain's ability to regulate mood and emotions. Progesterone, in particular, has been shown to have a calming effect on the brain, so lower levels can lead to increased anxiety. And it’s not just oestrogen and progesterone at play here. Testosterone levels may be fluctuating too and eventually decline. Low testosterone can be a huge contributor to your menopausal symptoms. Testosterone is what gives us our sex drive, our motivation and our ability to build and maintain muscle.
Also remember that all this is happening at age where there could be many life stressors such as children leaving home, caring for ageing parents, career pressures or facing retirement. If you are coming to the end of your working life and a career you could have questions about who you will be, what will you do, what will your identity be? This can be quite daunting.
And into postmenopause ....
Into the postmenopausal phase and these feelings of anxiety can persist. I know when I wake up in the middle of the night I often wake feeling anxious and I have no idea what the reason may be and the feeling hangs around, and then I can’t get back to sleep because then I do actually find things to worry about! And then the feeling often persists into the day and I spend the whole day with that feeling of being unsettled, or even pending doom.
Even in postmenopause our bodies are still trying to adjust to lower levels of oestrogen, progesterone and testosterone, which can affect our mood and anxiety levels.
If we’ve had chronic sleep issues during perimenopause these can persist which will contribute to anxiety.
We also have more age-related concerns as our awareness that we are ageing increases. So we might worry about our cognitive decline, our physical health and the fear of mortality.
We could be caring for our also ageing partners, our ageing parents and spending a lot of time (and energy) caring for our grandchildren.
Is there any hope?
All is not lost, we can help manage our anxiety by:
1. Get regular physical activity. Activities like walking in nature and yoga are ideal
for calming the mind. Partaking in some moderate to strenuous exercise can release endorphins which are our happy hormones. (A topic for a future blog)
2. Look at what you eat. Aim for a diet rich in vegetables, lean protein, and healthy fats such as olive oil and avocado. Reduce sugar, alcohol, caffeine (I’ll talk about Nutrition more in a future blog)
3. Make sure you get good sleep (which includes quality as well as quantity). Establish a sleep routine, try to go to bed and get up at the same time each day. I know this isn’t always possible. Turn off electronic equipment at least 30 minutes before bed. If you have a lot on your mind, do a brain dump before bed and write it down. Pass it from your head to paper. It’ll still be there in the morning for you to deal with. There is nothing you can do about most of it at 2.00 am anyway!!
4. Find your tribe. Find other women you can talk to, where you feel you can open up and even vent. Common humanity and feeling connected is so important.
5. If your life is busy try to plan and manage your time, prioritise the things that need doing and the things you want to do.
6. Take time for you. Even if it’s just the odd 5 minutes to walk away and sit with a coffee or sit with face mask on. Whatever it is that floats your boat and gives you a few minutes of calm.
7. Practice some relaxation techniques such as meditation and/or breathing exercises. There are a few good apps around at the moment that have guided meditations such as HeadSpace or Calm. Personally I like Calm because it has sleep stories too so if I can’t sleep or I wake up too early and want to go back to sleep I often listen to a sleep story. There are some lovely stories on there.
8. Practice some breathing exercises, such as:
a) Diaphragmatic Breathing (Belly Breathing)
b) 4-7-8 Breathing
c) Box Breathing (Square Breathing)
d) Progressive Relaxation
e) Alternate Nostril Breathing (Nadi Shodhana)
f) Mindful Breathing
g) Guided Visualisation
My own preferences are c) and Number e). C is easier to do in bed in the middle of the night because you can lie down for it.
I’ll add a description of each breathing practice separately.
One other thing to mention is that anxiety generally stems from projecting ahead, from worrying about things that MAY happen. Applying mindfulness and staying in the present can help reduce the anxiety.
As always, if you have any questions please reach out, my number is on the website, or you can PM me.
If you're navigating the complexities of menopause and seeking balance and understanding, you're not alone. There's a path to feeling like yourself again, and it starts with taking the first step. Reach out for a chat about how personalised coaching can support your journey towards reclaiming your vitality and joy. Together, we can work on strategies that align with your unique needs and lifestyle, helping you to embrace this new chapter with confidence and wellbeing."
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